More words
Airscope
The quiet mental rehearsal of an intubation while sizing up strangers in public.
Ampulash
Baftachat
A difficult meeting where you are forced to put on an award winning performance where you don't believe what you are forced to say. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Bagbreathe
The slow, rhythmic squeeze of an Ambu bag in the small hours.
Bedpull
The silent teamwork of moving a patient for the last time.
Beepaphobia
The terror that the second you fall asleep your pager will go off. Hence you can't go to sleep. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Beeperphantom
Hearing your pager go off when it has not.
Birthfumble
The mild humiliation of realising you forgot to book your own birthday off work.
Bleedline
The slow spread of red along gauze during a procedure, telling you more than the monitors do.
Bloatocracy
The fact that admin keeps getting larger even though front line roster aren't. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Bluesink
The cold recognition of cyanosis creeping in.
Breathchase
Breathtwist
The way your own breathing changes when you realise something is very wrong.
Chartghost
Chicago-no-hope
The service where everyone seems to be profoundly pessimistic. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Chopperholics
Doctors and nurses obsessed by helicopters despite the lack of evidence. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Clockdrag
The way the last 20 minutes of a shift stretch into an eternity.
Codeblur
Codestall
Standing at a secure ward door, blankly staring at the keypad, convinced youÕve forgotten the four digits that have been muscle memory since the start of your career.
Consultacaller
A doctor who just calls others to manage things. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Consultapalooza
When you open a chart to see every service in hospital has been called but none have properly engaged. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
CPRspring
Cupburn
The sting of a too-hot coffee gulped between bleeps, knowing it is the only one you will get all shift.
Cursorcrawl
Diagturn
The jolt when a colleague uncovers a new diagnosis in a patient you thought you understood.
Errisave
Farsilence
The distant quiet you hear on a ward at 3 a.m., knowing it can shatter at any second.
Firstlight
Flatlinehum
The endless drone of a monitor stuck on one note.
Gurneyrun
Handover Handwash
The ritualistic cleansing of responsibility at the start of a handover, heralded by the phrase: “I’ve only just met this patient so I know nothing about them, but . . ." Submitted by Sebastian Knudsen.
Heartdrop
The moment you feel the weight of bad news in your own chest before you speak it aloud.
Hospibrew
Lasttwenty
The warped stretch of time that turns the last 20 minutes of a shift into an epoch.
Lifespill
Liftwhisper
The hushed conversations in a lift after something terrible.
Linencross
Draping a sheet over a face for the last time.
Mealwheel
Morguequiet
Namefold
The way you mentally fold away a patient's name so it does't follow you home.
Nearmissium
The cold-hot relief of catching a near-disaster just in time.
Necropsylinger
The subtle trace of the pathology suite that seems to follow you out long after you’ve left—an olfactory reminder of the answers uncovered within. Submitted by Dr Susannah Lillis.
Nightwater
Notewell
The quiet satisfaction of writing a set of notes so clear you know they will outlive you.
Oslershit
Where you disappear to toilet and think through a tricky patient problem. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Pagerdrop
The instant icy sink in your stomach when the cardiac arrest pager erupts.
Panache
A cross between ache and panic. The feeling you get when you walk into a family meeting and suddenly remember you can’t think of the patients name you are about to talk about. Submitted by Sebastian Knudsen.
Phlevue
Pixelhold
The breathless pause while an X-ray crawls onto the screen.
Plastisweat
Poonami
That enormous bowel movement after days of opiate induced constipation. Submitted by Peter Brindley.
Rosterosis
The creeping malaise that sets in when the new rota drops into your inbox and you immediately start bargaining with your future self.
Scalpshadow
The faint line of dryness where a scrub cap has pressed all day.
Schuldobjekt
An object of guilt causing the feeling of owing a debt. Experienced after you’ve inadvertently harmed a patient. Something that has to be walked towards, not away from. Submitted by Adi Kumar.
Scrubshade
Shiftmelt
The total surrender of body and mind collapsing into bed after a brutal night shift.
Skinprint
Smockghost
Catching the faint smell of a colleague's perfume or aftershave long after they have left.
Snappluck
Solivane
From solus (alone) + vanus (emptied). A parent who has lost a child; one who moves through the world carrying an absence like a shadow.
Spongethud
The wet, heavy drop of a surgical sponge into a bin.
Stethfluencer
A healthcare worker who can’t resist filming themselves in their car, blue scrub cap perched just so, stethoscope dangling like a stage prop, dispensing wisdom or drama to their front-facing camera. Often found in the wilds of TikTok and Instagram. Submitted by an Giacomo Virstinuc.
Stilltone
Suturehum
The steady, meditative rhythm of needle, thread, and skin.
Title-clinger
A colleague who insists on being addressed as “Dr.” or “Mr.” or "Prof" at all times, bristling at the faintest slip into first-name territory—despite the fact that you’re peers, and you still have mental images of them passed out at 3 a.m. in medical school.
Trayclink
Trolleycreak
The uneven, rhythmic rattle of a square-wheeled trolley being pushed along a corridor.
Tubevision
Uro-detour
The moment you realise that, thanks to a switchboard mix-up, you’ve just spent five minutes trying to admit a patient with urinary retention to the neurology on-call team. Submitted by Jon Campbell.
Veinspotting
The idle pastime of scanning strangers arms for possible cannulation sites.
Walllean
Wardfloat
That dissociated drift through a shift when you're running on fumes.
Wardhum
The low, constant background noise of monitors, murmurs, and footsteps that you stop hearing until you leave.
Wardrift
The quiet dislocation that happens when a doctor’s body makes it home but their mind is still trailing behind on the ward — rounds looping in their head, charts whispering, patients lingering — leaving family meals and bedtime stories feeling like they’re happening just out of reach. Submitted by my
Wirehiss
Woundwarm
The radiating heat of an infected wound under your gloved fingertips.